Stop Staring
by somevelvetmorning
Summary: Everything comes crashing down for John Watson, a popular football player, when a tragic car crash kills his best friend. Thus meeting Sherlock Holmes, a punk cocaine addict, who changes him in ways he couldn't have ever imagined. Mental turmoil and guilt eats at his common sense as he is willingly pulled away from the side of the angels. -teenlock- -johnlock-
1. Chapter 1

John Watson was at his locker, putting his books away, when Amelia Roberts walked up to him, obviously attempting to flirt. She had light blond hair, big blue eyes, and was always fashionable. A stereotypical beauty. She wasn't really a friend of John's, more Eli's. But she would constantly rub against him, invite him places, text him and give him this mischievous look whenever she managed to catch his eye. She wore skirts that were a bit too short, and would probably be called a slut if she wasn't so popular. Instead it resulted as a major turn-on for guys, everywhere. For some reason, John didn't really care. That's why Amelia was so perplexed by him, she was used to getting whatever she wanted with her good looks and flirtatious glances, yet they seemed to have no effect on him.

" Hey, John."

" Hi Amelia. What's up?"

" Not much really. I was wondering, my parents are out of town this weekend, and I was thinking that maybe you could come over."

" Cool. Is it a party?"

" Well, I was thinking... maybe it could be just you and me."

" Ummm..."

" Don't worry, I'll let you think about it."

She gave one of her breathtaking smiles and ran her hand softly down John's face. Then she walked away, with obvious pride in her steps.

John sighed and shook his head. She shouldn't be trying to spend time with John, it was a waste. He was just clearly not interested.

John Watson was an A's and B's kind of student, also a popular high school football player. He was fairly attractive, with his lean body, sandy blond hair, and faded blue eyes. Teachers liked him for his respectfulness and good grades. He was a model student. You could say he was apart of the popular crowd, he was only daydreaming material for practically everyone else.

He was walking down the hallway, his eyes searching for his best friend, Eli Hemmingway. Eli was a bit of a ladies man, a player. It seemed he had a different chick every week, hanging on every word to escape his lips. John and Eli met when they first joined The Jaguars, their football team, as freshman. Eli has dark brown hair, a little long, framing his tan face and green eyes. A little taller than John. Suddenly he appeared next to him, so they were walking side by side.

" Amelia's parents are going away this weekend and she invited me to come over."

" Sweet! Can I come too?" He winked and they both started laughing.

" I don't really want to go alone."

" I don't understand what your problem is, she's hot stuff."

" I don't know..."

" Hey, I won't pass up the chance to tag along. If you won't snatch her up, then I might."

" Cool with me."

They kept walking and they spotted the dark patch of their school. It was the gang of weirdos and emos. Goths and punks. They were dressed in black clothes and if looks could kill, John and Eli would already be dead by now. As Eli walked by, he muttered " freaks" right by a girls ear, causing a girl to spin around wildly, with fire in her eyes, and flip the two of them off. Eli scowled and returned the favor.

" Those crack heads should just disappear. It's not like anyone would miss them."

John didn't say anything.

He didn't agree but thought it was wiser to not say anything at all.

John walked into his math class, sighed and put his books down. Then, out of nowhere, he felt a sweet, sickly pair of lips right next to his ear, whispering:

" Are you coming over tomorrow night?"

John whipped around, clearly uncomfortable with his previous position.

" Is it alright if I bring Eli?"

She glared and spit:

" You know what? Go ahead. Bring the whole goddamned street if you want to!"

Amelia stalked over to her desk and sat down with a large SLAM.

John sighed heavily. Now he wasn't sure what he was supposed to do now. He decided to ask Eli to bring a couple of friends.

John pulled out his phone, cleverly hidden by his books, while the teacher was giving a lecture.

_Hey, bring a couple of friends to Amelia's Friday night_

_~ Are you sure that's cool with her?_

_No. But there's no way I'm going to go alone. She told me to bring the whole goddamned street. _

_~ hahaha I'll just bring a couple buddies. Maybe she'll get over you_

_I hope so._

"Mr. Watson."

Shit.

" Can you remind the class of the meaning of r= a over p?"

John sat up a little straighter.

" No sir."

" Then I suggest that you **start **paying attention if you intend on returning to my class tomorrow."

" Yes sir."

John, unlike Eli, did not judge people. He was known for his good looks, smarts, and a kind heart. He felt a little guilty for making Amelia upset, but she had to get the picture at some point, right?

He wasn't really looking forward to the time he would be spending at her house tomorrow. Sometimes, when your social status is so high, you just have to do things you don't want to. John was tired of being so popular, the perks were what annoyed him most. He didn't care for the girls that fawned over him and hated to be envied. Sometimes he just wanted to be left alone.

Was that too much to ask?


	2. Chapter 2

* The Next Day...*

Eli was going to pick up John and their friends in his 2012 Jeep, so he waited patiently out on his doorstep, checking his updates. He would get through the night, and hopefully by Monday, Amelia would realize John's lack of interest and leave him alone. At this point, he wasn't a very deep thinker. John didn't really consider college, or really his future in general. So, instead of making a plan, he played the splashy fish app on his phone until his ride pulled up.

"Heeyyy John! Hop in!"

Eli flashed one of his toothy, white, grins and motioned to John. John smiled wide and jumped in with a couple of Eli's sophomore friends. We turned on " Do I Wanna Know?" by Arctic Monkeys and turned the volume to the max. He sank into the lull of the intense bass line, and to anyone who ever saw their Jeep that day, would have envied their presence. It was very chill, no, correction, they were very chill. They were popular and attractive and everyone knew it.

They finally pulled up to Amelia's gorgeous 3 story house, surrounded by a beautifully kept garden, just during a sunset. The other guys didn't seem to notice as they stumbled into her house. John reluctantly followed them in, taking his shoes off at the door. He turned to Amelia who was currently wearing a modest yet attractive yellow sundress. She smiled friendlily at all of them and then ushered the four of them downstairs.

" So, I raided my parent's liquor cabinet. I've got vodka, bourbon, scotch, what appeals to you?"

John looked up

" I don't really drink."

They all gave him this look saying : sure you don't.

* Around Two Hours Later *

The four of them were playing never have I ever and Eli and Amelia were a close match every time. John usually came in a close third. He had better things to do than eat dirt and French kiss girls. But he was still pretty wobbly.

Amelia slurred-

" Hey... why don't we play seven minutes in heaven?"

She brought over the empty vodka bottle and spun it around.

It landed on John. Of course it landed on John.

She smirked and grabbed his hand, shoving him towards the closet, closing the door.

It was pitch black, the aroma was a deep one, of pine and alcohol.

" Hey John... will you kiss me?"

John thought it over. She was defiantly too drunk to remember any of this and well... he was surprised she asked in such a civilized way. Plus he had never really kissed someone in the way she wanted to... John didn't really have girlfriends. I guess there's a first for everything.

He softly grasped her soft face and pushed their lips together, neither could take control, they were far too sloppy. Just lots of clashing and grabbing and closeness, they would stop in between for breath. John found it interesting but he didn't really indulge in it as much as she had. She had her hands in fists, grabbing fistfuls of his hair in her hands and pulling him closer. He was softly holding her head, letting her get all of her suppressed emotions out. Maybe this wasn't a good first real kiss, but I guess it wouldn't count due to their memory loss.

Finally she stopped and whispered

" I love you John."

He didn't get it. Here was this beautiful, fairly smart, popular girl, laying like putty in his hands and he couldn't care less. What was wrong with him?

Finally they left the closet to find Eli passed out on the floor, snoring lightly. John groaned and tried to wake him up, to no avail. John and Amelia lifted both of his armpits and managed to get him up the stairs and out of the house only to find that the Jeep was gone! John slapped Eli strait across the face.

* slap!*

" Ow! Whaattt?"

" Eli. Where is the Jeep?"

He dozed off again.

* Slap*

" What the fuck do you wanntt?"

" Where is the Jeep?"

" They took it to buy more or something"

" More what?"

" Vodka."

Amelia butted in.

" Hey, I'm pretty sober, I could drive the two of you home. The two guys can sleep it off at my house and we'll figure it out in the morning. If you don't get back your parents might worry."

John did feel very tired. Amelia looked pretty strait.

" Alright, can you help me with Eli?"

They lifted him into the backseat and John took shotgun and buckled up. Amelia hopped into the drivers seat and off they went.

Amelia seemed to swerve just a little, but he didn't live too far away right?

" John?"

" Yeah?'

" I've been wanting to kiss you since 7th grade."

" Really?"

" Yeah. You never noticed me though. Life is shit."

Suddenly they were in slow motion, the car was slipping off the road and heading towards a... a tree!

He watched as he jerked forward and pulled back. He watched Amelia fly through the windshield. He watched Eli become a bloody mess in the backseat. He felt the car crush. He felt so much pain, but none of it compared to the realization that both of the other passengers weren't breathing.


	3. Chapter 3

John's eyes fluttered open, as he awoke to the sight of a blank white wall above him, and blinding florescent lights to the right. He felt a dull pain in his head as he tried to figure out his surroundings. Where was he? He sat up and looked around, everything was white... was he dead? No... he was... he was in a hospital. But why?

Suddenly the memory of the night before hit him like the tree they crashed into. The blood and the kiss and the eyes rolled back and oh my god... they were dead. He could still taste her in his mouth! Her dead corpse...

He jerked up and tried to escape from the bed. Bathroom. He needed to find the bathroom.

It was hard, he was so dizzy. Everything was beginning to feel fuzzy and shaky all at once, he had to grip the wall to keep his balance. Why was it so hard?

"Concentrate. Bathroom."

All he could think of was her dead bloodied corpse, glass littering her once beautiful body. Rotting away... maggots. Her skull.

He found the door to the bathroom and walked in. John looked in the mirror and it was the most disturbing thing he had ever seen. He looked perfectly fine. His best friend was probably seriously injured and here he was, standing here, without even a scratch. He filled his mouth with water and kept swishing, but he couldn't get her taste out of his mouth. He even put soap in and swished around but he could still taste alcohol and cherry chap stick. John felt himself hurl all over the sink and the bathroom floor, lurching over, tears streaming down his face. The vomit was spread everywhere, and he fell to his knees, now sobbing. He knew they were dead, his best friend, a girl that loved him and he could have loved back. Her last words were " life is shit." She was right. Life is shit.

John became enraged. Why the hell did this have to happen to him? He was the star football player! He got good grades! He didn't deserve any of this!

He stood up and ripped the plastic soap dispenser right off the wall. He threw it across the room, and it landed with a satisfying crunch onto the wall.

Then he screamed and gripped his head, which now pounded painfully and collapsed onto the floor. Everything went black.

He woke up back in his hospital bed, the ache in his head dulling. He looked up to see his mother staring at him and clutching his arm, trying to force a smile on her face.

" John you're awake! Oh sweetie I'm so glad you're okay! How do you feel?"

" My head hurts."

" Well... you have a minor concussion John. You are very lucky that you haven't broken any bones, lucky to be alive!"

John looked down.

" Are they dead?"

His mother tried to procrastinate.

" What?"

" You know who I'm talking about."

His mother looked downcast, obviously uncomfortable.

" I'm so sorry John. They didn't make it."

He nodded softly. This couldn't be happening. If only this was a nightmare, and he could wake up in a few seconds and he could laugh it off.

His best friend. Was dead.

" But at least you're alive!"

John abruptly sat up and quietly stated:

" I should be with them."

He turned over to face away from them.

Eli, the kid he told he told all of his secrets to, wrestled with in his back yard, went on double dates with, made him laugh when he felt shitty, went to parties with, crashed on the couch with, his best friend was dead.

Everything was crashing down.

Sure he was never really interested in Amelia, but she loved him, and they passionately kissed in the closet and she was so beautiful.

So beautiful.

Not because of her blonde hair or big blue eyes or slutty way of dressing. Because she was alive. Because she was an eating, breathing, living person.

Everything was crashing down.

Tears were rolling down his cheeks like water falls. This wasn't fair. They didn't deserve to die. Sure, they did bad things, but serial killers deserve to die, pedophiles deserve to die. Not of a couple of rowdy teenagers.

" John, you know that's not true!"

" What's not true?"

**I included a lot of symptoms of a concussion. Not being able to focus and think clearly, not being able to remember new information. Headache, fuzzy vision, vomiting, dizziness, and balance problems.**

**Please review! You should see my face when I get a new one! My face lights up like a Christmas tree.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I want you to be aware that the language will become harsher as the story progresses. If you are offended by fowl language, I would turn back now. Everyone else, enjoy John and Sherlock's first encounter!**

John stayed home for a week. At first he was planning on staying longer, but he had to be distracted. He would do minimum work, because of his concussion. All the doctors were telling him to rest, except he wouldn't' be able to do that.

He couldn't stop thinking about Eli's dark blood, sticky, spattered all over the seats. His bashed in head, his eyes rolled back. It was the stuff of horror films. And it was all he could think about, all day everyday.

He missed his best friend, but he was bothered by the fact that he was being treated like Jesus. All he could hear all day when he got calls was

" Oh, that Eli was such a good kid. I'm sorry for your loss."

" Eli did such good in the world. I am so sorry for your loss."

" What a handsome and smart man. He tried so hard to be his best. I am sorry for your loss."

Eli didn't care about grades, constantly used girls, stole, bullied most of the kids in our school, got drunk frequently, crashed his first car. He certainly didn't contribute much.

" I am sorry for your loss."

What the hell did that even mean? They weren't sorry. None of them were. They had no idea what they were talking about, did their best friend die?

John didn't want their pity.

Every time he looked at something that Eli touched, it would bring back painful memories. John would curl up and clutch his head. His migraines would come back , his head would throb and try to muffle his sharp groans of pain with his pillow.

He would wake up screaming at the top of his lungs, and his mother would come running into his room, shaking him, trying to wake him from his nightmare. But she was wrong, because he was living it.

So the morning of his first day back to school, he didn't even try to look good. He threw on a pair of loose fitting jeans and his football hoodie. He swiped a comb through his short blond hair and was off. Eli would usually pick him up in his Jeep, but obviously that would never happen again. His parents offered to drive him, but instead he walked.

When he finally got to school, he felt hundreds of eyes settle on him. Whispers broke out. Pity glances. John hated it. He hated all of them.

He tore through the crowds ignoring their stupid questions they already had answers for.

But there were so many people... he felt a little sick. This was their form of entertainment, they had nothing better to think about. This was their big mystery.

He speed walked all the way to his first class, English.

He tried hard to concentrate, but his head was killing him and he could feel 15 sets of eyes staring at the back of his neck. He spent the first half of the day rushing around, avoiding everyone. He wanted to be a ghost, but they just wouldn't let him.

He was at his locker when he saw Amelia's best friend across the hallway, Zoe, doing the same thing as he was, warding them off. He walked over towards her.

Her eyes were filled to the brim with watery tears.

" Did she say anything before she crashed?"

John stared at her strait in the eyes before saying:

" She said: life is shit. Words of wisdom."

He walked away, running his fingers through his hair. He couldn't help but hear Zoe's sobs.

He wanted to collapse. He thought school would be a distraction, but it turned out to be a constant reminder of Eli and Amelia.

Lunch rolled around and John was standing in line when a kid tapped him on the shoulder. John turned around.

" John. I'm real sorry bout' Eli. We all looked up to him."

To the boy's surprise, John took is lunch, threw it in the garbage, and walked out to the outdoor area. He stood under some trees, where some other people were lighting up. It was a known blind spot. He pulled out his pack of cigarettes, he barely used it, usually to fit in. But he needed a distraction. Badly. He pulled out one, lit it, and took a huge drag, blowing out in a large grey puff.

Someone came and stood near him. He had black, curly hair, a bit out grown, almost covering his eyes, which were a brilliant bright green. He was pale and wore all black, but dressed very plain. A plain black tee, black jeans, black shoes. He wore just a bit of black makeup on his eyes. He seemed fairly muscular.

The teen pulled out a box of cigarettes also, but when he opened it, John heard a slight murmur of:

" Fucking Mycroft."

He pulled out a folded slip of paper out of his cigarettes box, which was empty. He read it over and growled, placing the box back in his pocket.

John walked over and offered a cigarette to Sherlock, who took it and murmured

" Thanks."

He lit it and took a large drag also.

Sherlock spoke up.

" You know, you're dead friend beat the shit out of me a couple weeks ago."

He didn't have any emotion in his voice.

John took a closer look at him. This was different. He was being honest.

" I'm not surprised. I never got his problem with anyone who wasn't as rich and popular as him. He was an asshole."

Sherlock looked a bit shocked. He didn't expect this from John.

" Sherlock."

" My names-"

" John Watson. You live with both of your parents and your sister. Your father is pressuring you into football, but you're thinking of quitting. Bad memories. You don't think he'll react well so you've been putting it off. You have an occasional smoking habit, which has increased lately. You have been having nightmares about the car accident. You only drink when you go to parties, in order to fit in. You never really enjoyed being popular, you only did it because of Eli. You are considering joining the army. You also don't like the recent attention you've been getting, you also don't like your dead friend getting special treatment for doing nothing. You currently don't have any real friends, no one you actually care about, leading to isolation. Yes, you don't need to explain yourself, I already know who you are."

John stood, with his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open.

" That...that was brilliant."

Sherlock looked slightly confused.

" It was?"

" Yes quite brilliant."

" That's not what people usually say."

" What do people usually say?"

" Piss off."

They started to laugh.

Sherlock put his cigarette out and dropped it on the ground.

" I'll see you around."

" Wait, will you be here tomorrow?"

Sherlock smirked.

" Bring me another one and I'll be here."

" Alright it's a deal."

Sherlock grinned and walked away. John grinned back.

They both hadn't smiled in quite a long time.

As John walked back to class he thought to himself:

" Maybe school won't be so bad."

**To clear it up: John doesn't hate Eli. He doesn't like the fact that he made really bad decisions and people were treating him like he was the most honorable kid in school. Lack of honesty.**

**Please review! It means the world to me. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Guys I can't even begin to apologize for how long I haven't updated. **

**I went on a very long internet-free vacation.**

**Forgive me.**

The next day John was almost excited to go to school.

This Sherlock character was quite interesting.

He wasn't a liar, and John found him...kind of...

Intriguing.

And attractive.

Wait.

What?!

John almost hit himself for thinking something so ridiculous.

Him? Gay?

No.

Maybe?

NO!

As he threw his clothes on he was just a bit unsure of himself, not sure how he really felt.

He walked out of the house, only looking forward to his meeting with Sherlock.

When he arrived at his high school he got the same kinds of stares as yesterday, but there were fewer.

His day felt like a depressing blur, instead of insulting or provoking anyone who tried to speak to him, he would just ignore them.

Which was somehow slightly more insulting.

To the people who did try to console him, it hurt, because they actually had the guts to walk up to him, and here he was ignoring them.

They normally would stomp away and then regret the decision later.

John didn't even ponder them.

He didn't ponder Eli either, he thought about that stupid fuck too much lately.

He thought about Sherlock, and only focused on lunchtime.

It's like he had found someone who actually understood him, because John wasn't as emotional as they thought.

He was only trying to forget and it seemed like no one wanted him to.

Finally lunchtime dragged around and he casually walked over to the blind spot, even though he had the urge to jog.

Sherlock was waiting, his complex green eyes hinting something while he gave a small nod of his head.

He wanted a cigarette.

John silently passed one over while he lit one up of his own.

There was a short silence until:

" You were looking forward to this. Nobody looks forward to the sight of me. Why do you?"

John thought he would go pink ( for some reason) but he calmly spoke:

" Because they're idiots. And you're not. You know I don't want your pity."

He saw the glint of a smirk at the first bit.

" I don't give pity. I'm not capable of feeling it."

John nodded.

" I am a genius. You've realized this by now I assume. "

John smirked.

Full of himself. But he could deal with it.

But he was honest and that's what John needed right now. Painful honesty.

Because he was right. Only a genius could tell all of that about him without talking to a single soul on a daily basis.

" Don't people know?"

Sherlock's sly smile turned down a little at the edges.

" They don't care to know me. I hear the names they call me. They are just as cold as I am."

" School?"

Sherlock violently turned to him with a cold stare in his eyes, almost burning into his soul.

John gulped.

" School is tedious and when I go home I delete all of the information I have received. It is positively useless."

He took a drag of the cigarette.

" So what do you do with you're free time?"

Sherlock seemed to get angrier and angrier as John spoke.

" The _fools_ at Scotland Yard refuse to consult me due to " age differences". I have to wait until 18 to solve their crimes. In the mean time...I have been...experimenting."

" Experimenting?"

" And observing."

John's interest was perked now, he had never met someone like this before.

Sherlock put out his cigarette and dropped it to the ground and John realized he hadn't even smoked.

Sherlock seemed to know.

" I had no idea I was so intriguing John."

He smirked and started walking in the other direction. Away from the school.

John quickly put it out and threw it on the ground.

" Where are you going?"

Sherlock swiftly spun around and faced him.

" Just because I am underage doesn't mean they can stop me."

He turned around and started walking away, towards the fence.

" Coming?"

John grinned.

" Absolutely."

Sherlock and John hopped the fence, and walked away from their school.

And John couldn't have been happier.


End file.
